Step Back
by Culaco
Summary: Two months after giving up all he'd worked to achieve in order to stop a madman with more power than anybody had hoped to achieve, just how is Ichigo feeling about his new powerlessness? Oneshot.


**Hello everybody and welcome to my Fanfiction debut, here with a Bleach drabble handling Ichigo's thoughts just a couple of short months after the Final Getsuga Tensho. Please leave a review, as I'd love some constructive criticism and guidance on how to improve!**

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 **Step Back**

2 Months.

It'd been two months since he'd made what was, to many, the ultimate sacrifice. Of course it was a good thing that he'd done so, if not all of existence would have fallen to Aizen, but ever since something had been missing. It wasn't hard to tell what it was, for anybody that knew the truth of what had happened, but just about everybody that knew him could tell he'd lost something. A shine in his eyes, a spring in his step, a fire in his heart.

It was all gone.

And who did he have to blame for that besides himself or Aizen? He hadn't been strong enough to stop Aizen without needing it and Aizen had been insane enough to merge himself with that god marble Hogyoku, propelling himself to heights that would take something drastic to reach. There were no others he could reasonably blame. Sure, Aizen should have been Soul Society's problem, but his threat was a threat that would envelop all of existence had Ichigo not taken up arms against the madman that had orchestrated everything.

And Ichigo- no, Zangetsu, had paid the price for it. Gone forever, a part of his soul ripped out and locked away forever. And all he could do was stand back and watched as his friends immersed themselves in the world that he'd locked himself out of until death, or perhaps even longer. Who knew if Zangetsu would ever return now? Or even a sliver of his power? He didn't know and honestly, at this point, he didn't care.

A strange sense of apathy was taking hold, weeks of watching his friends fight the battles that should have been his and putting their lives on the line for him instead of the other way around were taking their toll. His friends marched off on their own, confidence etched into their faces and courage carved into their hearts from the hardships they'd endured together, facing hardships they would have to get through without Ichigo.

And it hurt. It really, truly hurt.

He missed the camaraderie, the comforting weight on his back and the black robe that used to embrace his frame, filling him with confidence. The power that flowed through his very body, filling his veins and bones. He missed it all.

It was funny how, once you lost something, you could finally see how much you took it for granted. The faces of his friends as he appeared to save the day, their shouts of his name whenever he was in trouble and their encouragement when he truly needed it the most. Even Jaegerjaques and that hollow of his had been right about him. He missed combat, the clashing of steel and the rising and lowering of power as the war waged between him and his opponent. He missed the sense of purpose and direction that being a Soul Reaper had given to him, a feeling that he had lacked for the longest time since his mother was taken from him.

And it rained.

And it poured.

And Ichigo was still left with nothing to his name and soul. For all he'd accomplished in such a short time, managing tasks that many of the most talented Soul Reapers would claim to be impossible, the afterlife sure had a funny way of repaying him when they owed him so much. They'd left his friends alone to fight any hollows that would arise and left him to his own devices, sure that without his power he would settle down and return to the life of an ordinary teenager.

If they knew him, maybe they'd have changed their mind? Had he spent more time with them, maybe they would have grown closer to him to? Maybe he could have counted them amongst his friends as he did with a few. Rukia and Renji came to mind. Had they visited at all? Had his friends seen them? Did they watch over him and see what he was becoming with no power and no fight left?

Were they happy to see him as a normal person?

And yet, he found this to be an impossibility he couldn't disprove and shatter, now that he lacked the strength and the need to do so. People were safe without him, and though it pained him to admit it…

Maybe it was time for the number one protector to take a step back, and let others protect him?


End file.
